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Post by Medicated on Feb 7, 2017 10:56:33 GMT
Let's talk and write about love?
Is it intuitive, is it learned, what is it exactly?
Romantic love, true love, does it last forever, and if it doesn't, is it not true love?
Is there anyone here who does not have the basic requirements of food and shelter, safety and security?
And therefore, is incapable of having love?
Are there other conditions of being incapable of love?
What other questions about love can you answer, or do you have about love?
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Post by David on Feb 7, 2017 15:38:11 GMT
I define love as a strong desire for emotional union with another person.
However it means so many different things to different people.
It will be interesting to read what it means to other members here.
A most worthwhile topic Medicated
for it is a subject that is timeless in its significance...
in that impacts on the whole of humanity...
and has done so from the beginning of time and no doubt will
continue as a profound emotional not to mention emotive tool
in our psychological as well as physiological makeup impacting
on our personal development and well being throughout our lives.
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Post by David on Feb 7, 2017 16:21:36 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Feb 7, 2017 17:28:21 GMT
I think I may have found love again...but I am not sure...lol
However I have found a kind caring person who "likes me alot" as he puts it.
I accidentally rang him from the ER when I overdosed last time...so he knows my illness.
We have been friends for about 4 years on the internet as we belong to the same group...then he started ringing about 3 1/2 years ago.
He is a well known public figure where I live.
Why he would bother with me has be clueless.
After he was very ill last year I visited him and took a meal up to share with him.
Since then our friendship has taken a new turn.
However the one friendship I will not threaten is the new found friendship I have with myself.
I do not need a man to complete me for I am a stable unit alone.
However it is nice to have validation and companionship from someone other than a child I have created or one of my four legged friends.
It is overwhelming being treated so well after a toxic marriage
But it is just one day at a time as my friend has huge health issues of a physical nature
But thats ok...just one day at a time and we are friends foremost and importantly.
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Post by David on Feb 9, 2017 2:32:05 GMT
Good for you Sue,
You deserve such a break!
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2017 4:23:01 GMT
Thank you David x
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Post by Hercules on Feb 9, 2017 6:10:29 GMT
I will never find love again. I have given up. I think the main thing stopping me is how overweight I am.
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Post by Medicated on Feb 9, 2017 6:57:10 GMT
I recently fell out of love, like multiple times.
What they say is somewhat true though, it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all!
Additionally, I am pondering if I were to love myself, what would I change?
I think I would be kinder, be less demanding, and be less strict to myself...
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2017 17:31:40 GMT
Medicated I think loving yourself is the key, I certainly didn't while married and being hounded for being sick...however the last 5 years has shown me to respect and love myself....they say it is easier to give from a full glass than an empty one...yes be kind to you, tell those negative thought they are lying to you...pat yourself on the back for the things you do do rather than I should have done this or I should have done that...we get in a pattern of believing those negative thoughts. I think the only reason I will gamble on love/friendship again is because I care enough about myself to have boundaries in place I will not cross...my 30 year marriage sucked the life out of me and I lost me....NEVER doing that again xxx
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Post by David on Dec 22, 2017 22:22:59 GMT
Merry Christmas Medicated.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 24, 2018 8:02:01 GMT
I recently fell out of love, like multiple times. What they say is somewhat true though, it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all! Additionally, I am pondering if I were to love myself, what would I change? I think I would be kinder, be less demanding, and be less strict to myself... |
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Post by Sketcher2 on Feb 25, 2018 3:46:17 GMT
I have also given up on finding love. I am one of those people who have never loved at all. Not in the romantic sense. But it's ok because I still feel the love of family and friends.
I am now 42 years old and not as pretty as in my youth. People do judge you by these physical perimeters. I too am overweight as Hercules mentioned plus I am too sick for others to love me. I can hardly take care of my own health how can I be a support half to another?
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Post by Deleted on Feb 25, 2018 8:45:02 GMT
I'm saddened by most of the remarks here...so negative. I am so utterly unlike you guys. My early life (pre-35) was filled with romantic relationships. Most of these, occurring in the free wheeling 60's and 70's, were sexual as well. It all prepared me for my present status of husband/father/grandfather. My wife and I have always provided images of closeness between us for the kids...which were occasionally false. We didn't let our interpersonal attitude poison their young minds.
I may be unlike you folks in many ways, but I'm similar in one major aspect. I had a mental breakdown followed by prolonged depression. During that period covering several years, my wife never openly reflected the contempt she felt toward me. It wasn't all that hard to maintain that charade as we never stopped relating sexually. It has always been a major component of the glue that holds us together. I guess my point is that you have to be certain of your own priorities and those of your partner. Even if you experience intense conflict, if your goals and appetites match pretty close...you both have a shot at longevity. I should mention that my marriage only resumed overall cordial relations after I stabilized with medication. It only began to really grow again after I completely recovered...without it. My wife is Virgo/Capricorn...they must be constantly impressed to earn their respect.
A constant theme at MT concerned our associates who had never felt madness and couldn't possibly understand it. That may be the greatest impediment to love for those who have felt that wrenching dissociation from reality. Despite many descriptive conversations, my wife still doesn't grasp how that could have happened to me. She's just overjoyed that it ended...so am I. I wish I could offer more hope.
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Post by Hercules on Feb 25, 2018 9:46:14 GMT
I'm saddened by most of the remarks here...so negative. I am so utterly unlike you guys. My early life (pre-35) was filled with romantic relationships. Most of these, occurring in the free wheeling 60's and 70's, were sexual as well. It all prepared me for my present status of husband/father/grandfather. My wife and I have always provided images of closeness between us for the kids...which were occasionally false. We didn't let our interpersonal attitude poison their young minds.
I may be unlike you folks in many ways, but I'm similar in one major aspect. I had a mental breakdown followed by prolonged depression. During that period covering several years, my wife never openly reflected the contempt she felt toward me. It wasn't all that hard to maintain that charade as we never stopped relating sexually. It has always been a major component of the glue that holds us together. I guess my point is that you have to be certain of your own priorities and those of your partner. Even if you experience intense conflict, if your goals and appetites match pretty close...you both have a shot at longevity. I should mention that my marriage only resumed overall cordial relations after I stabilized with medication. It only began to really grow again after I completely recovered...without it. My wife is Virgo/Capricorn...they must be constantly impressed to earn their respect.
A constant theme at MT concerned our associates who had never felt madness and couldn't possibly understand it. That may be the greatest impediment to love for those who have felt that wrenching dissociation from reality. Despite many descriptive conversations, my wife still doesn't grasp how that could have happened to me. She's just overjoyed that it ended...so am I. I wish I could offer more hope. Good post and very interesting to read but don't be empathetic to your detriment. Don't be impacted so if others sound sad, they probably aren't sad they are just being matter of fact. |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 25, 2018 19:57:19 GMT
If one word could describe my nature it would be "empathetic". Pisces/Cancer couldn't be anything else. It used to work to my detriment when I actually tried to be a Christian. Loving my enemies is now, beyond my capacity. There was a time when I bought in to the whole thing and living where I did, the experience almost destroyed me. Nonetheless, perhaps because I encountered such conflict and aggression early on, I eventually came to love all people of decent character. Being sad (warranted or not) can be almost positive...a little melancholy can produce deep reflection and self awareness. I didn't mean to sound condescending or alienated.
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